What's so special about Arab countries anyway?

For a lot of people at home, our perception of Arab countries and people comes from what we see on the news.  War torn lands, refugees fleeing, dictators and human rights abuses are the messages we are bombarded with.  And dismally, for some people and places, this is the case.  But what about the other side of the coin?  There has to be some good, right?

I remember going into an office where I worked last year in Edinburgh and saying 'good morning' to a colleague who literally blanked me and walked on by, clutching her coffee.  There is a definite possibility that this person just didn't like me (I can be annoyingly perky at work) but there is also something about the way we greet each other.

The Arabic language, frustratingly difficult though it is, is rich and beautiful.  There are so many ways to greet each other that form a lovely daily ritual.  My favourite exchanges are between men, calling 'habibi' (my beloved) to each other in the street or across offices, and women, warmly greeting each other with a minimum of 3 kisses on cheeks.    It is not unusual to ask each other several times in one conversation 'how are you?', a pretty little conversational dance I have grown to adore.

This also reflects the slower pace of life and difference in priorities in comparison to what I am used to at home.  In the NGO office where I'm doing an internship, my manager takes the time to chat with me every morning about life and work, it might only be for 5 minutes but they are an important 5 minutes that make my morning positive and motivating.  In the afternoon, the team enjoy an impromptu lunch of  a variety of delicious snacks from the local supermarket, everyone sharing together.  There is an Arabic saying 'salt and bread' which is used to highlight the importance of sharing food together in building friendships, and it's really true.  I love these moments, particularly when someone passes the office and is immediately invited to join us and should refuse a minimum of 3 times before they are allowed to leave!

In Tunisia, I am ashamed to say that for the first time in my life, I saw children as a wonderful part of society as opposed to seeing them as mainly noisy and annoying.  At home, we have parks and cinemas etc, but all too often children are put in adult environments and told to 'behave like grown ups'.  Here, children are allowed to be children regardless of where they are and appreciated as they are.  Thanks to the closeness of extended families, inter-generational relations are also far more common place.

The next one is perhaps a little biased, but hey, it's my blog and I'll write if I want to :)  Imagine, we each had an invitation throughout the day to take 5 minutes to relax, breathe and refocus on what's important.  This is how I feel about the 'adhan', call to prayer.  I love hearing it, I love watching people stop, taxi drivers in car parks putting their heads to the ground seeking peace and refuge from life's daily stresses.  Even if you don't accept the invite, you know it's always there!

Finally, it's the feeling of being safe, which being a woman in this world is more of a luxury than a right.  It may sound strange to say I feel safe in Palestine, of course I'm talking about personal safety and as a visitor I am not living the same experience as Palestinians of checkpoints, soldiers and daily violence committed against them.  However, in the Ramallah streets or in the avenues of Tunis, I feel protected.  Palestinians lived for years without formal law enforcement like police, well respected community leaders were responsible for justice and did so through mediation.  No justice system is perfect but perhaps the sense of 'us' as a community as opposed to 'us and them' created a greater sense of security.

I would like to end this post by sharing an Arabic proverb with you which reflects my experience of living in Arab countries, with the kindest people I've ever known;

Going home

On 20th August, I began my long journey from Edinburgh to Tunisia, stopping in London and Paris. When the plane finally landed in Tunis, I was overwhelmed with nostalgia and as the doors opened, I took a long, deep breath.

Home.  I was finally home.

How I had longed for that day, to have a Tunisian stamp in my new passport, to be greeted with 'peace be upon you', to hear Arabic again, to travel down streets called 'Rue Pakistan' & 'Rue Palestine', to disregard seatbelts and queues and to throw myself into the busy crowd and get lost forever, in jasmine and sunshine.

It's strange to go back somewhere you never really left.  Tunisia has become such a part of who I am, I can't ever leave it behind.  This time, I was there for a wedding and to visit friends and a very important little girl.  But I was also there to see if everything I felt remained.  Was 2012 merely a happy period of my life or could I have new stories, new love and life in Tunisia?

As soon as I seen Lucia, the Italian other half of me I felt myself again, maybe for the first time since I left.  We hugged in the street outside the big mosque in 'Passage' and I grabbed a fistful of her lovely little curls as I always did.  She'd stayed on after I left and was making a new home with her Tunisian half :)  As she had to work, I made plans to catch up with old and new friends in Tunis before we would travel to Sousse together.

I made the decision to meet up with someone I knew only via Facebook due to our shared love of Palestine.  I was a little apprehensive but oddly, less so than I would be in Edinburgh.  Wrongly or rightly, I have always felt safe in Tunisia.  Jihed met me with gifts of jasmine and flags from the greatest countries on earth - Tunisia and Palestine, ofcourse.  We met his sister, a writer and had a fantastic lunch in a rooftop restaurant in the medina.  They invited me to a concert at night in Carthage, Roman ruins overlooking Tunis.  To my delight, it was Shadia Mansour, a rapper from London and I was lucky enough to meet her at the end of the night.  In less than 24 hours, two people who had never met me before, gave me one of the most special days of my life.

Returning to Sousse where I spent the best year of my life was extremely emotional for me.  In one city I found myself, found soul mates & family, found love and the life I had always dreamt of.  I guess I was a little scared that my feelings would have changed, that maybe my city had become too intertwined with my feelings for the man I fell in love with there.  But very quickly I remembered that actually, my heart belongs to Tunisia, before anyone else.

I will always have a reason to go back and it's not because of one person, it is because of every person.  Jalel, my dear mentor and his wonderful family who always welcome me like their daughter and sister.  AJMEC and its members - the association who took care of me and even gave me a place to stay this time around.  My sister Mariem, who makes such a difference to this world, breaking barriers and prejudices simply by being her wonderful self, she inspires me everyday.  The beautiful little girl living in SOS children's village in Akouda, who threw her arms around me and brought peace to my heart.

Until next time, n7ebbekom (I love you all) x

'' Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is."   - Louis de Bernières

11 must do things in Tunisia

Visit Tunisia

The original title for this post was '10 must do things in Tunisia'.  In my planning I thought the best idea was to brainstorm as many 'must have experiences' as possible and then narrow it down to the top ten.  Big mistake.  

I've tried to include names of places, restaurants etc but many of these experiences you will stumble upon yourself, and that's what will make it truly memorable.  These are the moments captured from the 'first dates' of travel, the ones you will tell your grandchildren about and that will live with you forever.




The Sahara by Camel

Travelling to the Sahara is one of those things in life that you never envision yourself doing.  It seems like an impossible dream, too distant to even imagine.  The reality really hit me whilst sitting at the top of a sand dune, the sun was setting and we watched an elderly woman make her way home through the desert.  As we made our way back to the bus on our camels, my friend Lucia and I took each others hands, both laughing and smiling incredulously about what we were experiencing.  The family who took us out on the camels tried to make extra income by selling small handcrafted dolls.  I handed one of the girls who looked about my age a 5 dinar coin and took one of the dolls.  Moments later she was knocking on my window looking at me and to the sand where she had dropped the coin.  Then by some miracle she found it and we both smiled and waved to each, celebrating together.  I'll never forget this girl.  I watched her until we drove away and she disappeared into the distance.

Couscous at home

I realise that if you're coming to Tunisia on holiday for a week it might pose a bit of a problem to invite yourself to someones home.  However, you haven't tried real Tunisia cooking until you do.  In the home you will also get a taste of family life and a quick and intense insight into Tunisian culture.    Failing that, the next best thing (that I've tried so far in Sousse) is La Fiesta, I had couscous with fish but they also prepare it with lamb if you prefer.     

Stop.  And listen to the 'adhan'

To me, there is nothing more beautiful than the sound of the call to prayer.  In all of the chaos and noise of life, it has the ability to make everyone stop and centre themselves again.  It reminds me of why I'm here, and reminds me of why I wanted to come here in the first place.  I know a lot of people like to hear this the most at morning prayer but I like it at 'isha', night time prayer.  At this time the mosque is lit up and looks beautiful.

Take a 'louage'

This is the most common method of public transport, cheaper than a private taxi and will stop anywhere you flag it down.  They take a little getting used to, you need to know the route or at least the last stop to avoid getting completely lost.  I could count on both hands the number of times I've seen tourists take the louage.  I assume this is because taxi's are still relatively cheap here in comparison to the UK so why bother?  Well if like me you like to get a sense of life and local people I'd recommend this.  I was fascinated by the exchange of money, the way the driver is able to remember who has paid, everyone saying hello or good morning as they enter, calling the driver 'brother'.  Oh, it's also a little faster than the driving we are used to at home.... and there are no seatbelts.  You'll survive. Do it.

Visit a hammam

I absolutely adore the hammam.  It's a great day out with your girl friends, is cheap and leaves you feeling replenished and as soft as butter!  
The hammam is a public steaming bath house and in Tunisia you can find them everywhere.  Go first thing in the morning when it's fresh and clean and you can get a really intense scrub (if your skin is burning that's normal!) from one of the women working there.  You can have your hair washed, a massage and waxing too.  Enjoy!

Dance to the Darbouka

The darbouka is the traditional Tunisian drum with a very distinctive sound that pulsates through your entire body, to your fingertips and toes -  you'll be dancing before you know it.  

I have some incredible memories accompanied by the sound of the darbouka.  Whilst travelling around Tunisia as part of a group, we listened to it for hours and everyone sang together.  You can see 3 generations in one room, all singing the same song.  It's really incredible.

Something sweet in Monastir

I love all of the Patisseries in Tunisia, even the bad ones are pretty amazing.  They are so good that even when you eat 3 in a day, that normal sense of guilt at such gluttonous behaviour is barely a whisper.  However, you haven't lived until you eat from a patisserie in Monastir and this is not an exaggeration. 1 dinar = 1 slice of heaven.

Tea, scenery and shisha in Sidi Bou Said

Sidi Bou Said has a charm and beauty that you can't describe and that photographs do a great injustice.  You could never imagine that just twenty minutes away from the busy capital there is this little paradise.  Wander through the little cobbled streets, take photographs of the beautiful blue and white buildings and just soak up the tranquility.  You'll find a cafe which over looks the coast, enjoy a traditional tea and shisha here.

Discover the Souk

In my city we don't have a lot of fresh food markets and the ones that we do tend to be full of overpriced organic for the upper class.  This is one of the reasons it's such a treat for me to visit the souk here, it's a totally different way of living.  It's so much more social than just filling your basket and waiting for the checkout operator to tell you the price.  It's noisy, vibrant and full of life.  It's also much cheaper than supermarkets and better quality produce.  

Watch the sunset over Tunis

I completely fell in love with Tunis the second I arrived.  I sat on Avenue Bourguiba watching the world pass by, remembering all the imagery from the revolution on this very street.  But what really left me speechless was the view from the rooftop bar in Hotel El Hana International.  We arrived there around 5pm and watched the sunset, the cafes fill up with people drinking tea and smoking shisha -   I can't describe the feeling I had in this moment but it will stay with me forever. 

Meet the children

Tunisian children are the most kind, sweet and friendly little treasures you could ever find.  They are so polite to one another, so respectful of their parents and so full of happiness.  They bring light to all that is dark.

So what are you waiting for???